sunset

A little bit of emptiness is humbling, but when the pale overflows with in the emotional hemorrhage of complete loneliness and the body starts to ache from being so hollow, it ceases to serve any purpose. I feel like I am outside looking in, unable to reach a stranger in my own body. I keep trying to get the attention of the scared kid that I am staring at, but there's no response. I know this feeling is most likely caused by the state of my life mixed with a bit of remaining teen angst that I haven't completely gotten rid of, but that doesn't offer much sollace. I'm am unfinished.

The setting sky, however, is a perfect finish to one less day in my life. Its sheer burst of visual flavors remind me of the countdown, and I only hope I will grow as an individual at the pace that is needed to do something worthy of remembering before unawareness wraps itself around my lifeless body.

Soon I will start my flight training over again in helicopters, with the vague hope that I can do something to help humanity. I am almost starting completely over again. I'm okay with that. I need something to pull me out of my habbit of self pitty.

I keep telling myself I am okay. While I know this to be true, sometimes I do not feel that way. I miss her warmth, even if she hurt me. That love I lost I now give to the world around me, I hope it is enough.